" Shadow of a Doubt"

" Make peace and forgive yourself and others. "

Shadow of a Doubt

How many times have you heard this phrase? For me It's been plenty. I know by experience, there is strong truth to this.

What does this phrase really mean?

If there is a 'Shadow of a Doubt' that you have not forgiven, life living will not be peaceful and negative thoughts will sit with you forever. These thoughts can change your moods and if they start to pile up --- will ultimately change you as a person. Each time you forgive, you stay true to yourself and feelings of anger, frustration, shame, or sadness fade. We have all heard the saying, "Time heals." Yes... time heals feelings that are true feelings of forgiveness. When you're sad because of a loss, you grieve and than move on. When your sad because you have been betrayed, you don't grieve. Instead you fester over unforgiving thoughts. Unforgiving is like an open sore that never closes.

The more this happens --- the more it festers. ANGER is the result of this and it will grow in the unconscious part of the mind. When this happens... It doesn't matter if it is a good day and the sun is shinning, because you are developing into an unhappy individual.--- You won't be able to get out of the clouds.

Some people blow up easily and some people go quiet and withdraw from the world. Everybody has a different way of displaying the 'pile ups' of 'unforgiveness'. In short the 'unforgiveness' becomes our shadow. Our 'unhappiness' in life walks around confused not knowing why we are not happy!

Everybody has some unhappiness, that is why forgiving is such an important part of being. From the beginning of childhood our parents tell us to forgive. You learn from your siblings that, 'to forgive and forget and move on' is a important part of growing. Did we all forget this as adults?

An example:

Forgive yourself for having chubby legs. Look down at them and see the good in them. At least you have legs that walk.
Or if you are paralyzed, forgive yourself for being paralyzed! Look at what you do have, like the beauty of your surroundings... Nature, family and pets.
You are still alive, so live and don't stop!
If you are having a difficult time forgiving someone. Put yourself in that persons shoes and write down at least 5 reasons why they would of done what they had done.

When you shine a light in your imagination on the things you need to forgive...Only goodness comes!

Forgive and move on, because happiness is being you!

Most of us have problems forgiving ourselves and others too.

Think of how lucky you are to be alive and able to forgive! You will find eventually forgiveness becomes more automatic.

Remember if there is a " Shadow of a Doubt " that you haven't forgiven---then go ahead forgive, because you know what to do...

Happiness will always follow your way.

RUN YOUR OWN SPACE

"DO YOU WANT HAPPINESS?"

"YOU WILL LIVE A HAPPIER LIFE"

When you go to your own uninterrupted space for 15 minutes each day. You are listening to nothing but the sound of your

heart as it diligently beats a rhythm. If your heart could sing, it would sing a song that would lead to the inside of who YOU really are. STOP for just a moment and think of how wonderful that moment might be.

What an easy NEW START for 2008! Go ahead and think of an away spot or if you already have one... Don't forget to go there every day. And...listen, listen, listen. Your inner voice is just waiting for YOU!

HAPPINESS is being TRUE to YOU!

What have you done so far?.....................

What have you done so far? Anything? Not yet? ... That's OK--- you have this time now to think of what you really want to change in your life. What is it that you want to change? Big changes can send you over the edge. A tiny change could actually change your life...towards the positive. I have been trying to think of a small change, but it is hard to think.

There are so many big things to change... It sends me to orbit!

Big changes rarely materialize or last. Do it right--- you won't have to fight! OOPS! I've got to go!... I'm off to my "away space" to decide what to change. There is always room for change.

Change directs you closer to the real you.

*Remember you are doing this change for YOU! *

Nobody else matters except for you. Everybody will benefit from you change! Of course we all know why that is... It's because you took another step towards being a HAPPIER YOU!

New Start!

We are rounding to the end of the year 2007! I hope you all had a great year. I bet it has many great stories! Guess what? Next year --- will no doubt--- be an absolutely better year! We tend to think too much of all the things that we didn't do and even compare ourselves to others. It can make you feel very discouraged. So you gallop forward with plans to start new the next year. The mistakes are already written on the wall and are set up to fail. ---Isn't that what happened last year...and the year before... and the year before that, and the year before that... Sit back and relax... Tell yourself you did a GOOD JOB. Sure, there might be some things that you needed to tend to or maybe lots of things you never got to. Some people keep repeating the same mistakes again and again; over and over, year after year! Now is the time to stop and put this yearly habit to a halt. You have to change your perspective on making a New Years Resolution. Think more simply and start with tiny steps to changes. If you keep making overwhelming resolutions, your life will have a difficult time getting better. A popular example being weight loss. Choose only to change one meal instead of your whole diet. You may see results that take a little longer, but you are learning to change slowly. It just becomes easier. Realize that learning is waiting on your doorstep every single day. If something in your life is not working for you---you have change. This can be a very scary word for some, but ultimately a good word. When we change, we are learning. Learning keeps us healthy and we have been doing it since the beginning of our own creations! So lets look at the word change, as more of a good fix and celebrate it. Deliberate (intentional) change is easier if it is small, because it isn't overwhelming and it can actually be fun. Here is an example of a small deliberate change: Tomorrow instead of taking your shower in the morning before you go to work ---take it in the evening just after the supper clean up. (Forget the TV shows) See what happens...! After about a week assess the change. Was it good for you? You are like a scientist! The only way any scientist can figure out the results in their experiments are to assess. Since the change you made was only small you can give it a short term experiment. Although if you are an individual that likes more confirmation or(seeks second opinions) you can take this experiment to a long term. (a couple weeks to a couple of months) BE SURE in the end to assess your results. -------------- THIS REALLY IS AN EXPERIMENT! So you've changed something and you are finding that having a shower in the evenings are much more relaxing than in the mornings. You are able to collect yourself and your thoughts. You are just thinking... and feeling relaxed...there is no rush and no worries. Hey, you found a new AWAY SPACE! You are happy, because you have more time in the morning to talk to your kids and husband. You aren't rushing anymore, your not late anymore! Life has changed for you--- for the good. You just made one change and walked yourself into a little more happiness. You found some new away time and space. A little more happiness came your way. You thought you had done one change, but... you really did two, or maybe three. Even when there is just a small change in your life other changes follow. It is almost like dominoes. It isn't overwhelming and you barely notice it. Change doesn't seem nearly so scary and little changes are harder to fail. It is much easier to focus. The clearest way I can make you see this is to imagine the universe as a great big clock. There are notches and a chain of life that keeps this clock going around and around. Now, imagine the notches slipping into the same old chambers that they always go into. The clock stays the same year after year after year. Now imagine the chambers slightly off in size so that there is never a great fit from where the notches meet the chamber. This gives the clock a slightly unhealthy squeak. Now you--- have changed something so small in your universe like the shower "time" change. You have changed your universe! --- Your universal clock. This great big universal clock would do the usual going around, except now the clock is smoother and the sound that comes out of the clock is a small sounding"hum mm". The change that you have made has shifted the chain slightly so that the notches fall into a new chamber, but one that has a better fit. The chambers are bigger so that your notches fit better. Like a perfect fitting shoe. Life for your universal clock is now smoother and wiser. When you make your New Years Resolution this year make sure you go to your away space and think of just one tiny positive change you could do in your life. YOU WILL SEE WONDERFUL THINGS START TO HAPPEN! This is your homework for the better of life and your happiness. It doesn't seem like much, but the rewards will be huge! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

A very Merry Christmas to all!

Be all that is and all that is true too.

Christmas is almost here and I can hear little feet sneaking around the house in hopes of finding a unwrapped hidden present. I'm really running out of hiding spaces. There are cookies to bake, turkeys to thaw and Christmas supper to plan. Each day begs the question, "How many more days?"--- We have family to visit and friends to gather. There are trees to decorate and lights to hang. Excitement is in the air.

But... this year will be different, because this year I learned something new. I learned that life is really much bigger than I thought and that there is more to life than meets the eye. There is "Me- myself and I." These are "3" very important individuals we should never attempt to forget. Although we do all the time! Each day we forget about our "SELF" is a day we have lost with our "SELF"... It takes so much time the next day to get your "SELF" back. So try... try really hard not to let your "SELF" get away from yourself. Reflect upon the best parts of you and always be true to yourself and to others. Don't try to improve just on the things that we are good at, but try to also improve on the things we aren't so good at.

When you start out the New Year--- have a good one and be all that is and all that is true too.

Take care and Have a Happy Holiday!

Your Inner Child is Waiting for You

• So you've had a hard day... I'm sorry, I get them too... What do you do when you simply feel exhausted and there is dinner to make, kids to tend, homework questions to answer and the house looks like a dump? Your head is in a spin! OR You've just walked in from a difficult day of work and you're having a difficult time transitioning yourself. Too many demands on your time and patience and not enough words to fill it! You really just want to scream and say. "STOP!" There is no time to run to your away space. Retreat doesn't look good... Except if you just say "I have to go to the bathroom!" There are ways to fool your mind and to calm yourself down without ignoring how you are really feeling... You are in the bathroom and yes close the door. This is where you have to... "Grab on to that feeling" This is where you have to imagine yourself in your away space. Be honest with yourself and take a deep breath. Tell yourself that your feel "FRUSTRATED" and say to yourself with a few more deep breaths, "I am happy!" ------ "I have a family that loves me!" What ever you know makes you happy and provides you with unconditional love no matter what the circumstances.
• If you are having difficulties feeling this... ( We all do from time to time, especially when you are at odds with your teenager or wife/husband, sister/brother, friend etc.) Grab on to that feeling of bliss... When you first kissed When you first saw your newborn When you found out you were pregnant When you learned how to ski Spending the last exciting time with friends

Grab on to that feeling and don't let it go. If you haven't noticed already you will have found yourself smiling! If you haven't yet ---- JUST SMILE ANYWAY! I had a comment in a past post that said, "Don't judge until you walk a day in my shoes!" All of us are different. Some of us just have hard times--- all the time. Some of us are truly sad or depressed. (even clinically depressed) We all have a responsibility to look after our soul. If we ignore are inner feelings... Yes I said feelings--- because feelings are thoughts. We are simply just ignoring ourselves! There are other names that will make you feel more in touch with you. Your INNER CHILD --- Your TRUE SELF ---- You wouldn't ignore your own baby if it was in distress and frustrated. You would do everything in your power to make your child/teenager happy if h/she was depressed. Then why wouldn't you just do it for yourself? Smile and see what happens. You smile back at frustration you send love. Isn't that what makes this world go around? So go grab onto that moment now--- You owe it to your inner baby!